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Mother... I love you.

I was a difficult kid. I listened to no one and respected no one. I had more fights in school than my brothers. When I was in school, I was a straight A student. I was the 1st on my class and the smartest of them all (my teachers say so). Well in short you can say I was a tom boy. I was the middle child, thus; I had one mission: to annoy my mother.I spent 18 years of my life just annoying my mother. I was 18 years, 1 month and 13 days. When that day came.

24th/ September/2005

 

It was a Saturday. I waked up, washed, dressed and went to college. I didn't see maman before I left. Before I left she asked me to have breakfast with her and I said "no thanks. I want to go to college early to meet a friend and study 4 an exam I have later today. am already late."

 

I never did see her again. She died that afternoon. She wasn't sick or old. She was healthy 48 years old woman. It was fate. My sister picked me up from college and took me to the hospital. She said my mom was a bit sick. The truth was that my mother was dead. I saw her covered with a sheet but I didn't believe it. I didn't want to; she was too young to die. She was my MOTHER. The shock was something I couldn't take. I cried that day. I never cry. And then it hit me hard. All the times I pissed her, all the times I annoyed her, that very morning came back to hunt me. I still remember all the times I told her I don't hate you instead of telling her I love you. She was the most important person in my life. She's the only woman I ever loved. Hell, I loved her more than I loved myself and if you really know me you'll know that am crazy about me. 

 

If I can turn back time, I would've spent that day with her. I'll just hold her and tell her how much I loved her. I miss her a lot. Every time I go shopping I remember her. My clothes, my perfumes, my hand bags she picked almost all of them 

 

This September marks the 4th year since her death. It still hurts. I miss her more than ever. 

 

 

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  • May 11, 2009
    Edit | Reply
    How I wished I could turn back the time for you to make it right...
    But at the same time I think... don't be too harsh on yourself.
    Your Mum is your Guardian Angel now. She knows how much you loved her then and that you now love her... even more.

    Greetz and be blessed!

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