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I'm so pissed! I was driving down the highway, heading home after having spent all day at school. My friend Rosalia, on certain occasions, car-pulls with me since she doesn't own a car just yet. Well, as we were on the way home she asked me if I could drop her off at her boyfriends' house (Luis); who lives just a few blocks down the road from me, so it wasn't out of the way or anything. So, I turn off the main highway, go down a couple back roads, and enter his neighborhood...
I'm so pissed!
I was driving down the highway, heading home after having spent all day at school. My friend Rosalia, on certain occasions, car-pulls with me since she doesn't own a car just yet.
Well, as we were on the way home she asked me if I could drop her off at her boyfriends' house (Luis); who lives just a few blocks down the road from me, so it wasn't out of the way or anything. So, I turn off the main highway, go down a couple back roads, and enter his neighborhood.
We pull up at his house and she gets out. I drive off and head back through all of the little back roads and towards my house.
A police cruiser passes by....so I wasn't speeding or anything. One thing to note is that trees grow along the sides of these back roads and their branches hang over the road as well.
So, I was driving down the road (not at all speeding) and just as I'm passing under this gigantic tree one of the branches breaks off and crashes into my windshield smashing not one, but TWO holes into the windshield. It also cracked all the way across the entire span of the window and knocked the passenger side mirror off.
It sounded like a softball had hit the windshield; it was loud as a fire cracker. Glass sprayed everywhere inside the car: the passenger seat, the backseat, and me. Luckily, I had simultaneously slammed on breaks, ducked down, and closed my eyes right as it the window cracked.
After this happened, I pulled off the road and parked the car. I got out to look at the damage and see what had hit the window. I didn't believe it was a branch at first because it wasn't very big. It was about a foot long and maybe 2 inches thick!
After checking it out I drove home and showed my grandpa who then called the windshield guy. He arrived an hour later and was done with the installation of the new windshield, glass clean up, and sealing in less than an hour!
Five hours later, my lovely car was good as new! Thank God! I was so relieved since without my car I'd have no way to get to school. Then I would have been stuck at home with....THE MONSTERS (my siblings).
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by Weego
8 minutes ago,
100 words.
All.
1 comment.
I'm getting deeper, but not yet deadlier, into my story of Amorphia, Vaicity, and The Three Arachnids
I'm getting deeper, but not yet deadlier,
into my story of Amorphia, Vaicity,
and The Three Arachnids
of Death and Immortality
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just...just someone find a way to save me from myself...i know im going to die if i keep going like this....please god send me an angel
just...just someone find a way to save me from myself...i know im going to die if i keep going like this....please god send me an angel
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Sooo I am learning that men are completely clueless unless you tell them exactly what you want and what bothers you. They don't think about other people's feelings when they decide on an action. I don't think they intentionally do it to be selfish...I just think they really are clueless. My boyfriend constantly will make plans with me and cancel them. Even if it's the same day we made the plan. I understand he works and he's tired. Not like I'm asking him to run a marathon with me wh...
Sooo I am learning that men are completely clueless unless you tell them exactly what you want and what bothers you. They don't think about other people's feelings when they decide on an action. I don't think they intentionally do it to be selfish...I just think they really are clueless.
My boyfriend constantly will make plans with me and cancel them. Even if it's the same day we made the plan. I understand he works and he's tired. Not like I'm asking him to run a marathon with me when we hang out. I completely trust him and I know he's not stepping out, I completely believe him when he says he's going to sleep or relax. It's just the fact that he cancels on me. I've been tired before when I've hung out with him, but I do it because I want to see him and spend time with him.
When he does this it makes me feel...unimportant. And I really think he is oblivious to the fact that I could feel this way when he cancels our plans. Like it doesn't occur to him that it makes me question his feelings for me...or whether or not he really means it when he says "I love you."
Okay...done ranting. Thank you..if you've read this far...for reading my thoughts. Much love xoxo
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by joker38
28 minutes ago,
300 words.
All.
2 comments.
Ugh!!Ok so.My friend Todd has been a total pain ever since his cat died.I feel bad for him but i miss my happy cheery party buddy.Wayan and I TRY to help but hes been soo annoying.He whines alot now too.(lol) Wayan and I thought about getting him a cat for his birthday,but he might explode. Its pretty rare when Todd explodes.Its only happen 2 times ever.Todds a pretty simple guy.SO WHY IS HE BEING A PAIN IN THE ASS!!? Wayan and I have ...
Ugh!!Ok so.My friend Todd has been a total pain ever since his cat died.I feel bad for him but i miss my happy cheery party buddy.Wayan and I TRY to help but hes been soo annoying.He whines alot now too.(lol)
Wayan and I thought about getting him a cat for his birthday,but he might explode.
Its pretty rare when Todd explodes.Its only happen 2 times ever.Todds a pretty simple guy.SO WHY IS HE BEING A PAIN IN THE ASS!!? Wayan and I have taken him everywhere but hes turning into a buzz kill.
What am i going to do!?!?!My buddy needs me!Hopefully he will be himself again soon.
Thats pretty much all thats been going on.School is gonna be started my mum said in like 2 weeks.2 FLIPPING WEEKS!!!!!WHERES MY SUMMER!!ITS GONE TO FAST!!
WHY!!WHY!!ITS NOT FAIR!!MY SUMMER WAS TAKEN FROM ME!I DONT WANT SCHOOL TO START YET!!NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!WHY!!!ITS TOO SOON!!
I dont really think im ready,lol.I MISS SLEEPING IN!!!!!ITS GOING TO BE A LIVING NIGTMARE!!!!!!!!KIDS EAT KIDS FOR BREAKFAST THERE!!
Im gonna miss not seeing londen(the dog)around all the time.
Isnt life amazing.It can be crazy mixed up and happy.AND YOUR WORST NIGHTMARE!!!!
MUAHAHAHA THATS RIGHT YOU BETTER WATCH OUT!!!
So.If you agree summer should last forever.Check out this song:
schools out/schools out for summer by Alice cooper. (and its sang by a dude.lol)
My summer.You summer.Everyones summer!IT MUST LIVE ON!!!!!!!!!
VIVA LA SUMMER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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http://allpoetry.com/poem/6672853 for fiesta. this was challenging for me because i have never argued something using math. of all topics, this was the one for me... and i'm glad i was able to do something that i genuinely cared about. i would have killed myself if i had to pretend that i cared about global warming.
http://allpoetry.com/poem/6672853
for fiesta.
this was challenging for me because i have never argued something using math.
of all topics, this was the one for me... and i'm glad i was able to do something that i genuinely cared about. i would have killed myself if i had to pretend that i cared about global warming.
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by sarwwa
36 minutes ago,
200 words.
All.
0 comments.
for those of you who dont know wat inkpop is, its a website were you can post your stories and get a better review and commentary on them. Its not like "omgee i love your story write now." they have really read it and tell you where you can fix it up to make it more intersting. you can swap books- means you read someone elses book and critique their book and they do the same for your book or books. Also by ever monnth if your story is ranked as the top ranked read picked or listed or enter in...
for those of you who dont know wat inkpop is, its a website were you can post your stories and get a better review and commentary on them. Its not like "omgee i love your story write now." they have really read it and tell you where you can fix it up to make it more intersting. you can swap books- means you read someone elses book and critique their book and they do the same for your book or books. Also by ever monnth if your story is ranked as the top ranked read picked or listed or enter in a contest and win a editor from harper collins looks over it and calls you. It takes months though sometimes so be patience if you do. theirs no garentee's but its really good for all you serious writers.
if your intersted go to http://inkpop.com/ and make an account. you dont have to pay for a membership. its absolutly free.
it's really cool their, you can even make a front cover to your book. if you have an account already or are going to make one, look me up Sara Star or let me know. (:
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I lost my muchness. I am just not that muchy anymore. I don't know what to do or say anymore,and I can't seem to make anyone happy. I don't fee like I fit in. I feel like a puzzle peice that was shoved into the box with the wrong puzzle and when the whole puzzle is put together I don't have a place. I don't know what to do or how to fix things. I don't know how anyone else fits into the puzzle either but I would like to. I need help. I need to figure myself out. Sorry if I seem a little off m...
I lost my muchness. I am just not that muchy anymore. I don't know what to do or say anymore,and I can't seem to make anyone happy. I don't fee like I fit in. I feel like a puzzle peice that was shoved into the box with the wrong puzzle and when the whole puzzle is put together I don't have a place. I don't know what to do or how to fix things. I don't know how anyone else fits into the puzzle either but I would like to. I need help. I need to figure myself out. Sorry if I seem a little off my rocker. I just don't know what is wrong. I don't even know if there IS anything wrong. I just feel.... out of place... I guess that's all....
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My baby girl, Sakura. Thank you to Gauntletier for helping me come up with the name
My baby girl, Sakura. Thank you to Gauntletier for helping me come up with the name
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by Andii.
1 hour ago,
200 words.
All.
0 comments.
Fucken. One of my friends on facebook, who I've known since year 11, was having a bitch this morning because she got underpaid, OH NO!!! Honestly. She lives at home, with her parents, doesnt have a job, doesnt have a boyfriend, doesnt have kids, she'd probably pay about $60 in board, and probably spends about $40 on food every week. What would she have to go without if she were underpaid? She was talking the other day about getting her labret done, oh noes, that'...
Fucken.
One of my friends on facebook, who I've known since year 11, was having a bitch this morning because she got underpaid, OH NO!!!
Honestly.
She lives at home, with her parents, doesnt have a job, doesnt have a boyfriend, doesnt have kids, she'd probably pay about $60 in board, and probably spends about $40 on food every week.
What would she have to go without if she were underpaid?
She was talking the other day about getting her labret done, oh noes, that'll have to wait if she got underpaid .
Would she have to go without food? No. She lives with her parents, that's never gonna be an issue for her.
Would she have to go without things that are essential for living? No. Once again, mummy and daddy will solve any of those problems.
Now.. since this is my journal, i'm gonna make this about me slightly
If I were to be underpaid, there are 4 other people in my life who would be disadvantaged.
Josie would have to go without nappies, my rent probably wouldn't get paid, the electricity wouldn't get paid, shit would get cut off.
So honestly, I dont think she has ANYTHING to whinge about.
some people.
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July 29th, 2010. Wow. Its already July 29th! Summers almost over! It makes me depressed! I don't want to go to stinky school! But, I might as well enjoy the summer for now. On Saturday, I'm leaving for vacation Yay! My cousins and my family are going, to NH, and we are going to hike, swim, and go to an amusement park! The drive is a few hours () and we just got a new car! The new car, you don't ...
July 29th, 2010.
Wow. Its already July 29th! Summers almost over! It makes me depressed! I don't want to go to stinky school!
But, I might as well enjoy the summer for now.
On Saturday, I'm leaving for vacation Yay! My cousins and my family are going, to NH, and we are going to hike, swim, and go to an amusement park! The drive is a few hours () and we just got a new car! The new car, you don't twist a key to turn it on! You have to have the key with you, in your purse, hand, pocket, etc. and the car will sense it. Then you press a button!
Plus, the TV in it, it's two screens, and so two people can watch seperate movies, or even play wii! It's awesome! My Dad and Mom are actually at the car dealer now, buying it!
Peace out!
-Alex
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by Kari
2 hours ago,
All.
0 comments.
ummmm scary >.> http://mobile.venturebeat.com/2010/07/28/android-wallpaper-app-that-steals-your-data-was-downloaded-by-millions/
ummmm scary >.>
http://mobile.venturebeat.com/2010/07/28/android-wallpaper-app-that-steals-your-data-was-downloaded-by-millions/
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So now tiphani is getting with devin. Everyone always chooses him over me. First it was alex And now it's tiphani. Obviously, there's something wrong with me. There's some reason no one wants me. Alex keeps telling me that there are people out there That will want me. But how can i believe that when every girl i get close to Leads me on or just straight-up rejects me? I hate it. I hate my life. I cut myself again. I now have 42 cuts....
So now tiphani is getting with devin.
Everyone always chooses him over me.
First it was alex
And now it's tiphani.
Obviously,
there's something wrong with me.
There's some reason no one wants me.
Alex keeps telling me that there are people out there
That will want me.
But how can i believe that when
every girl i get close to
Leads me on or just straight-up rejects me?
I hate it.
I hate my life.
I cut myself again.
I now have 42 cuts.
Alex likes to brag that she has more than me.
She has like over 100.
And i am jealous of her.
Haha.
She's been busting a nut trying to keep me from cutting
But it didn't really help :/
So now tiphani thinks i don't want to be her friend anymore
And idk if i want devin to come to my party..
he'll probably just talk about getting some from tiphani the whole time.
Of which he KNOWS will hurt me.
Tiphani says he won't.
But that's all he does around me and the other guys.
She says he won't cuz he doesn't around her.
Well no shit.
He's not going to talk about that around girls.
Only guys.
Fucking duh.
I now noticed that in my journals
All I do is ramble on about random shit.
You have a problem with it?
Well fuck me in the ass and call me skippy.
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no, i am not depressed. no, i do not think like a 'normal' person yes, i see the future yes, i am insane yes, some think of me as wise yes, i think backwards. any questions?
no, i am not depressed.
no, i do not think like a 'normal' person
yes, i see the future
yes, i am insane
yes, some think of me as wise
yes, i think backwards.
any questions?
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I learnt something today, something that made me think about what I am, and who I want. I know that things in life are the most complicated things that anyone can comprehend with. I took the time to realise that, no only am I proud of who I am, but I'm proud of the people who aren't afraid. Loving and caring for people is different than wanting to be with them forever and share your life and your bed with them. It's about being true. Being honest. I want to be honest with the world and I know...
I learnt something today, something that made me think about what I am, and who I want. I know that things in life are the most complicated things that anyone can comprehend with. I took the time to realise that, no only am I proud of who I am, but I'm proud of the people who aren't afraid. Loving and caring for people is different than wanting to be with them forever and share your life and your bed with them. It's about being true. Being honest. I want to be honest with the world and I know that it hurt some people when things like this happen but, I know what I want. What I want is to be with my girl forever. I want to ask something, I don't need an answer but: What do you want? I want people to be happy, to be who they are and be proud of who they love. You see, all these sex maniacs aren't so bad, but they fail to see love. How can you truly know someone through just sex, but how can you know them without? It's the border, the line that you either choose to cross or not. For me I see that this line isn't something I want to cross with more than the person that I am with now. I can't take to see people sad, but I'm sick of hiding away with everything else. I know to some people that what I am going on about makes no sense at all, but to me, it makes perfect sense, and for some reason I can't stop typing. I have never ever wanted anything more that to be out, as they say "out and proud" but so many people in my life have tried to stop me and why? I ask myself why? Still I'm not a 100% sure but I know one thing. I won't let them be in my way or judge me any longer. I'm so out! I'm so gay that no one will ever change me. I have always wanted to be honest and now, look at me. I'm finally being the Salliee that everyone didn't want me to be. I know to some I'm a disappointment, and to others, damn you will understand me more now, but why be mad? I'm still me. I can't stop thinking about the one girl that makes me happy to the point I want to marry her. I want to have a life with her, and make her feel like the princess she is. Why is it that people tell me, you're to close to your male friends to be gay, how are you? They are my FRIENDS, just friends. I love them to pieces but I don't want to jump in their bed. I found my path, I found my true meaning and I want people to know me and have me as their friend. Tab is my guarded princess and I still am the dyke in shinning armour that saved her. I don't know if she truly thanks me for it but, hell I'm so gl...
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I want to fall in love. The butterflies in the stomach. The hours spent doing nothing. The wanting to be together all the time. I want all that. And more.
I want to fall in love.
The butterflies in the stomach.
The hours spent doing nothing.
The wanting to be together all the time.
I want all that. And more.
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August 10, 2009 I bet you cant even remember what happened that day That was the day we met The day i thought my life meant something Boy did everything change January 18, 2010 Everyone knows that day Martin Luther King Jr. Day But to me the start of it all Our first date We snuck out early in the morning You drove and sang to me in the cold Do remember where we went? We went to the mall So many firsts happened that day I will ...
August 10, 2009
I bet you cant even remember what happened that day
That was the day we met
The day i thought my life meant something
Boy did everything change
January 18, 2010
Everyone knows that day
Martin Luther King Jr. Day
But to me the start of it all
Our first date
We snuck out early in the morning
You drove and sang to me in the cold
Do remember where we went?
We went to the mall
So many firsts happened that day
I will always remember the things you'v said and done
February 23, 2010
Who knew being an artist would come in hand
You grabbed me when i was painting
Decided you missed me too much to wait 3 more hours
Ill never know what happened during 6th period that day
The school basement is so much more memorable now
We had our first kiss there
February 26, 2010
Who knew tutoring would be so fun
Or at least thats what my parents that i was doing
We had 2 hours together
Not nearly enough time but we made it work
As soon as school let out we drove to the park
So much for playing on the swings
It poured rain and never stopped
My mom never did believe i fell into a puddle of mud
April 28, 2010
The best date of my life took place
We didnt eat dinner
We didnt watch a movie
Everything was closed
And everyone was asleep
We snuck out at 1 in the morning
You even stole your mom's car
How i love the park
We walked until i fell on you from fear of what was hiding
"Dont worry. I'll protect with my life. Mo matter what." You said
I fell in love that night
You told me you love me
"I love you too" I replied.
We started fooling around but it didnt go far
5 a.m was when my alarm started to ring and thats when we speed home
I didnt make it past 2nd period before i crashed
I missed you so much that day
Your mom forbid you from going to school sense you had the "flu"
June 7, 2010
That night we truely made love come alive
My parents left on vacation and you slept over
Not much sleeping happened
We proved to eachother what our love really means
You were my first
My only
I felt as though the whole world disappeared
It ended too soon
You had to go home before your parents woke up
July 14, 2010
Did you forget?
I stayed up crying
I didnt want to believe what i heard
No answer
I pra...
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Hey guys i'm leaving tomorrow to go on vacation so i wont be on AP for awhile i will be back the 4th but i might not be back on until the 6th. just wanted to let ya'll know i might check in here and there if i can get connection to the internet... but yeahh. so i love you guys and will talk to you all as soon as possible With Love Rose
Hey guys i'm leaving tomorrow to go on vacation so i wont be on AP for awhile i will be back the 4th but i might not be back on until the 6th. just wanted to let ya'll know i might check in here and there if i can get connection to the internet... but yeahh. so i love you guys and will talk to you all as soon as possible
With Love
Rose
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Grey is my color, A mix of white and black, Pleasant on the outside, But inside, watch your back. Happy smiles, eager ears, You don't know what it's like, to listen to your fears. ... I believe in Yesterday.
Grey is my color,
A mix of white and black,
Pleasant on the outside,
But inside, watch your back.
Happy smiles, eager ears,
You don't know what it's like,
to listen to your fears.
...
I believe in Yesterday.
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No legitimate assessment of "lonely" can be made until you've cut your own hair. Yeah, part-time job- I already made the joke in my head and ON it!!! Have fun ya'll!!!
No legitimate assessment of "lonely" can be made until you've cut your own hair. Yeah, part-time job- I already made the joke in my head and ON it!!!
Have fun ya'll!!!
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When huskies begin to go missing, renowned fortuneteller Jamie Kiost is brought in to tell the future of the huskies. Instead, the future is fire. So Jamie Kiost's child, Tenamazu Kiost, decides to do something to change the fate of her favourite dog breed. All the while, a dangerous dog is beginning to break out of his pris...
When huskies begin to go missing, renowned fortuneteller Jamie Kiost is brought in to tell the future of the huskies. Instead, the future is fire. So Jamie Kiost's child, Tenamazu Kiost, decides to do something to change the fate of her favourite dog breed.
All the while, a dangerous dog is beginning to break out of his prison and a girl making music videos suddenly ends up making music videos of the future. What is it in the Scottish air that is giving people so much power? And could it be dangerous? Jamie Kiost knows, but is determined not to reveal it...
For those who haven't read the original, that was the "blurby thing". Not a proper blurb, but an idea.
Last time I talked about the Riml and Kiost families. Now, I'll be focusing on paragraph two.
The dangerous dog breed is a black labrador. Sound scary? No. Look scary? See for yourself, this is the dangerous dog.
...do you think I'm mad? Well, this dog is. It was driven mad with the grief of her owner's death. Yes, it's a female dog. Male enemies are overused.
This female dog is called December. (Feels a little odd, since December would probably be snowy) She, oddly, is an intelligent dog. Most dogs are dumb.
December is a powerful dog, and she needs three or more tranquilizers to knock her out. She was chained by her owner's daughter, who had been attacked by December countless times.
That's everything about December for now.
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you have to listen to this i dont care if ur fans of avenge sevenfold or not its a realy good song so good it made me cry http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=z0ikpviowXc
you have to listen to this i dont care if ur fans of avenge sevenfold or not its a realy good song so good it made me cry
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=z0ikpviowXc
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I'm single. Maybe I'm just not the type of girl to be in those type of relationships, cause I'm bound to not take things seriously. It was such a long and emotional thing and every about him is perfect, but I'm not, and I saw that imperfection with every evening I spent with him and I felt the pressure to live up to this idealization of the person he had in mind, when in all reality I wasn't even ready... I can't even figure out who i am, or who I wanna be but I do know that...
I'm single.
Maybe I'm just not the type of girl to be in those type of relationships, cause I'm bound to not take things seriously. It was such a long and emotional thing and every about him is perfect, but I'm not, and I saw that imperfection with every evening I spent with him and I felt the pressure to live up to this idealization of the person he had in mind, when in all reality I wasn't even ready...
I can't even figure out who i am, or who I wanna be but I do know that I need to worry about me, just me. Being alone and figuring out what I can do with my life. I need to know I can make it on my own, before I figure out if I can make it with someone else...I have all these dreams and aspirations and I haven't even begun to discover what my capabilities are.
I don't know me and I have no confidence in me, and I need to find these things, I need to build up these things to be able to give my all in a relationship like this one, one of the greats, one of those relationships that would have carried on for years, maybe leading to both of us just completely intertwining our lives together, but I'm not ready...and I can feel my heart beating hard against my chest, and I can hear the desperation through the phone as I'm talking to him, but I can't look back and get those "lonely" feelings anymore, it's time to move on and grow out of the bad habits.
I just keep seeing this bright and wonderful thing I might be giving up and maybe I am, maybe I will never find anything like this again and I'm just hopelessly throwing away the only thing that would have amounted to anything in my life. Can i live with leaving him behind for my own selfish conquests?
I can't begin to describe the feeling I have in my chest right now, it's worse than most things I've felt, and this dying dream of mine, the apartment the plans, the moving in, collge plans etc...it's all wound up in the same person i just told that I can't do this to. How can I know I am doing the right thing for me? When I've never in my life done the right things for myself. It's all about finding the dramatic and complications and nothing working out as planned, this one thing, this one boy, was to plan...and I threw it away.
UPDATE-
We are still doing the trip later this month, as friends,
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The world is a bit boring when there’s absolutely nothing to do. I chill at home and do a bit of nothing because the sun is out to get my skin! (Like seriously, though. You could perhaps fry some eggs and make pancakes on the sidewalk out of that hyperbole!) So I am stuck indoors, watching films, painting, drawing, not really writing, and holding onto the tempest of… air conditioning. I can’t even sit at my living room computer because it’s so freaking hot in there (despite the fan)....
The world is a bit boring when there’s absolutely nothing to do. I chill at home and do a bit of nothing because the sun is out to get my skin! (Like seriously, though. You could perhaps fry some eggs and make pancakes on the sidewalk out of that hyperbole!)
So I am stuck indoors, watching films, painting, drawing, not really writing, and holding onto the tempest of… air conditioning. I can’t even sit at my living room computer because it’s so freaking hot in there (despite the fan).
By the way, I never really spoke about how I put up all my IB art class pieces up in my room, did I? Well, we have a corner full of those, and another side of the room with a half-mural (which I need to fix, big time). There is also a broken wire peace beside the corner, which I need to fix, too… but I need masking tape (black masking tape).
& if I could, I would totally take off in some type of public transportation system and visit my friend at the gallery, but the gallery closes at… [Yes, I went to check -_-] 5 p.m. and although there is like less than 45 minutes left, no I am not going to fry my skin off…
Damn, I’m stupid.
Anywho, I want a film to watch, and I’m totally gonna get off and try to scry for a few ideas, because I feel closed in, confused, lost, and without anything to do… like… no clear ideas on idleground unless I planned to work with Fey and finish my abstract painting… (which looks like branches on fire so far.. lol)
BUT BLAH!!!!!!
G’bye ♥
P.s.
My birthday was coolastic until it ended up being a normal day. :/
Does that happen much with anyone? ♫♪
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by Unbreaking
4 hours ago,
200 words.
All.
2 comments.
So...today, not so good....um. Well, I can't tell you guys why I'm so upset, you'll just have to understand it's one of those things I don't wanna talk about. And I was in tears last night over a lot of things, I started thinking of Amber...and I'm 5 states away from her. I have to go to North Forney...that sucks ass. And well, the same thing I'm even more upset about today...it all swirled together, tears started streaming and well, now I'm pissed at myself. 3 months and a day I did...
So...today, not so good....um. Well, I can't tell you guys why I'm so upset, you'll just have to understand it's one of those things I don't wanna talk about.
And I was in tears last night over a lot of things, I started thinking of Amber...and I'm 5 states away from her. I have to go to North Forney...that sucks ass. And well, the same thing I'm even more upset about today...it all swirled together, tears started streaming and well, now I'm pissed at myself. 3 months and a day I didn't cut, I was doing good, then yesterday I just got so upset I put a few deep gashes into my arm before hopping into the shower. And I felt so so much better after that...then a few of those things came back and slammed me in the face again. Plus parents, (not even my own) are yelling at me. Mark's parents yell and scream at Mark about me as if I'm not even there. And I get criticized a lot when they start yelling at him. According to them, "That kid is the reason you never get anything done." At least, that's what they constant scream in his face, usually while I'm standing not very far away. Sigh....I feel like shit.
I can't believe I cut again...I feel like a loser always cutting like I do. I wish I could borrow some self-confidence from someone who has some extra....sigh
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