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I feel like I am losing control... A control I have worked so hard to maintain so that someone doesn't end up hurt. My temper flares more often than I keep track, and there are times when I just start to cry for no apparent reason. At work I pace to keep myself focused and mentally grounded. Last Saturday it didn't work. Half of the time I was pacing I didn't know where I was, and the remaining time I spent thinking: "Give me a knife, give me a razor blade. Give me something so I can ha...
I feel like I am losing control... A control I have worked so hard to maintain so that someone doesn't end up hurt. My temper flares more often than I keep track, and there are times when I just start to cry for no apparent reason. At work I pace to keep myself focused and mentally grounded. Last Saturday it didn't work. Half of the time I was pacing I didn't know where I was, and the remaining time I spent thinking: "Give me a knife, give me a razor blade. Give me something so I can have some sort of release."
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I'm tired of faking a smile and pretending everything's okay when it isn't. When the smile hides the frown, a laugh hides the tears. I may not show it, and no may be aware of it, but I'm slowly dying inside.
I'm tired of faking a smile and pretending everything's okay when it isn't. When the smile hides the frown, a laugh hides the tears. I may not show it, and no may be aware of it, but I'm slowly dying inside.
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by Wind Chaser
6 hours ago, In Anger, Angst, Bitter, Depression, Escape, Hate, My life, Pain, Personal, Teen issues.
100 words.
All.
0 comments.
Had two sexual encounters on Wednesday with guys I didn't really know. Cut myself again last night, it was worse than last time. But, it was a release. I just want to be held and told everything will be okay! But, I know it's not going to happen. I'm lost, I don't know who I even am anymore. I feel like one of these days I'm just going to quit caring and I'm going to let go of all the control I have fought so hard to maintain. If that happens, I know someone will end up hurt.
Had two sexual encounters on Wednesday with guys I didn't really know. Cut myself again last night, it was worse than last time. But, it was a release. I just want to be held and told everything will be okay! But, I know it's not going to happen. I'm lost, I don't know who I even am anymore.
I feel like one of these days I'm just going to quit caring and I'm going to let go of all the control I have fought so hard to maintain. If that happens, I know someone will end up hurt.
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At the ER at Skiff, being transferred to Mercy-Franklin. Been here since 12ish. Crystal stayed till almost two. Talked to Rachel. Want and need to talk to Sid, tried calling. He was sleeping. I'm terrified of how he will react when he finds out, and if he will care enough to come when I need him. I love him so much it hurts. Granted, he didn't know when he broke up with me yesterday that it was the worst thing he could do at the moment. I just want to run. I'm tired ...
At the ER at Skiff, being transferred to Mercy-Franklin. Been here since 12ish. Crystal stayed till almost two. Talked to Rachel. Want and need to talk to Sid, tried calling. He was sleeping.
I'm terrified of how he will react when he finds out, and if he will care enough to come when I need him. I love him so much it hurts. Granted, he didn't know when he broke up with me yesterday that it was the worst thing he could do at the moment.
I just want to run. I'm tired of waiting... I'm tired of fighting. I just can't feel right now; it's easier not to.
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I feel so dead inside. I'm a living zombie... I'm just going through the motions. I'm lying when I say I'm fine. A smile hides the frown and a laugh hides the tears. Nothing is fine. When I don't want to feel, I can't stop. And when I want to feel I'm so out of it that I can't.
I feel so dead inside. I'm a living zombie... I'm just going through the motions.
I'm lying when I say I'm fine. A smile hides the frown and a laugh hides the tears. Nothing is fine. When I don't want to feel, I can't stop. And when I want to feel I'm so out of it that I can't.
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It's a constant battle to be good enough. To be able to measure up to everyone else's standards. But I'm never allowed to pass the test. The eyes are a mirror into the soul. It's too bad no one ever sees the truth reflected in them... Why can I pretend I'm okay and everyone believes it, but when I show them that I'm not they think I should be? Some people believe in hell, but the truth is life itself is hell. Why do I feel unworthy of being happy or of being loved? The...
It's a constant battle to be good enough. To be able to measure up to everyone else's standards. But I'm never allowed to pass the test. The eyes are a mirror into the soul. It's too bad no one ever sees the truth reflected in them... Why can I pretend I'm okay and everyone believes it, but when I show them that I'm not they think I should be?
Some people believe in hell, but the truth is life itself is hell. Why do I feel unworthy of being happy or of being loved?
The voices talk to me and I answer. Some would call me crazy, but for me it's normal.
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I just wish I could turn back the clock... April 2010. One single month of true happiness in a lifetime of misery. Eight hours of pure joy. Intense passion. All gone now. Lost forever with nothing left of those two days but a memory. Some people say time heals all. But, it doesn't. Some wounds can start to heal and then be ripped open again. Why do I see a brick wall when I look to the future? Words that would begin to describe how I feel at the moment: Numb. It's easier ...
I just wish I could turn back the clock... April 2010. One single month of true happiness in a lifetime of misery. Eight hours of pure joy. Intense passion. All gone now. Lost forever with nothing left of those two days but a memory.
Some people say time heals all. But, it doesn't. Some wounds can start to heal and then be ripped open again. Why do I see a brick wall when I look to the future? Words that would begin to describe how I feel at the moment: Numb. It's easier to block it all out than to analyze it right now. I'm empty inside, and I'm alone on the outside. The smile is a lie...
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07/29/2010 Why i so life complicated??...why is it when your in high school people expect way too much out of you?..why is the when you do a miastake, it seem like if it's the end of the world? i have tried to be the perfect child my family expects out of me, but when i do a slight mistake all of what i've worked for ends. i have to start from square one. yes i appear to be the perfect child, but in the inside i have a ticking bomb, and i feel like the expolsion is near. i ...
07/29/2010
Why i so life complicated??...why is it when your in high school people expect way too much out of you?..why is the when you do a miastake, it seem like if it's the end of the world? i have tried to be the perfect child my family expects out of me, but when i do a slight mistake all of what i've worked for ends. i have to start from square one.
yes i appear to be the perfect child, but in the inside i have a ticking bomb, and i feel like the expolsion is near. i have subside it by cutting myself, but that no longer seems to work.
i have made desions base on what my family want to see and hear. i have become their robot. I have no life of my own, because it has been stolen by them. when i try to take control they seem to find a way to lure me back into their gasps.
im suffacating. i have no reason to live, but when i do they take it away. they think they are doing what's best for me but when in reality they are hurting me the most.
they say they let me live as a teenager, but it seem more like a teenager in prison. i dont go out, because they don't trust me as much as too see i will always do the right thing.
i need a way out but it seems too much for now.....
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You know the other night before my art class i went for a walk in town. Along the mall by myself, and you know what i knew it was dangerous. in fact i was waiting for something to happen. Was hoping something would happen. It wasnt that i was suicidal. i wasnt i just lost my purpose somewhere along the way. and i dont wanna live for the sake of being alive? otherwise everything is pointless. and i dont want to have a pointless life. so here i was walking along. in the dark in a dangerous plac...
You know the other night before my art class i went for a walk in town. Along the mall by myself, and you know what i knew it was dangerous. in fact i was waiting for something to happen. Was hoping something would happen. It wasnt that i was suicidal. i wasnt i just lost my purpose somewhere along the way. and i dont wanna live for the sake of being alive? otherwise everything is pointless. and i dont want to have a pointless life. so here i was walking along. in the dark in a dangerous place. hoping that a bus would hit me or maybe someone would mug me. because that way if i survived it id have a reason to live. id have that fight, that zest for life ive been searching for. but nothing happened. nothing ever happens. i wanted to scream. i wanted a knife to my throaght. i wanted to be scared. to feel the need to live. i felt nothing. i felt alone. and i felt empty. and now with all thats happened in recent days i dont want to be alive anymore. i dont want the zest. and i dont want to fight to survive. i want to give in to the pain. i want to bleed out all the hurt. i want the walls painted red. i want the disaster. i want the tragedy i want the suffering to end in one climactic finale. i want to make it hurt on the way and burn out quietly. to fade away and nobody will even notice.
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The day has finally come. I've been waiting for it with bated breath...and it's rather depressing. When I grew up, the wishing-dream used to be, 'If I had a million dollars.' There was even a song about it. But now, a million dollars is just a mere sneeze and we need a billion dollars... Sigh.
The day has finally come. I've been waiting for it with bated breath...and it's rather depressing.
When I grew up, the wishing-dream used to be, 'If I had a million dollars.' There was even a song about it.
But now, a million dollars is just a mere sneeze and we need a billion dollars...
Sigh.
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I Nearly Lost You. And I Have Never Ever Been So Afraid. I've Never Cried So Much In My LIfe. I Never Want To Have To Talk You Down... Never Want To Fear Not Holding You Again To Be Fearful That I Will Never Kiss Your S...
I Nearly Lost You.
And I Have Never Ever Been So Afraid.
I've Never Cried So Much In My LIfe.
I Never Want To Have To Talk You Down...
Never Want To Fear Not Holding You Again
To Be Fearful That I Will Never Kiss Your Soft, Perfect, Lips Again...
To Never Be Able To Hear You Say I Love You Again....
Or To Hear It Back...
I'm Going To Completely Change For You, Baby..
You'll Never Have To Worry Again.
I Promise You.
And I Mean It...
With Everything I Am....
I Love You, And I Will Never Hurt You Like That Again...
♥
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i'm afraid i'm falling back into depression.. i don't want to talk, i don't want to move, i'm sad for no reason.. i think i'm going to start shutting myself down again. i'm not eating right. not only that, but school starts soon and i moved so i won't know anyone. i might close my FB account and whatnot. what do i do? i don't want to be the person i was before, but i don't want to fight the sadness either..
i'm afraid i'm falling back into depression.. i don't want to talk, i don't want to move, i'm sad for no reason.. i think i'm going to start shutting myself down again. i'm not eating right. not only that, but school starts soon and i moved so i won't know anyone. i might close my FB account and whatnot.
what do i do? i don't want to be the person i was before, but i don't want to fight the sadness either..
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"Wanna Go for A Ride?" "Sure Ken!" "Well Forget It!" I'm an ugly girl, my face makes you hurl sad I have it, I should bag it Acne everywhere, unwanted facial hair I'm a relation to Frankenstein's creation "You're so ugly you disgust me" I'm a bland homey girl All alone in the world I'm as flat as a board Thin and lanky You're a dog and a troll Were you hit by a train? Don't go near you 'cause you breath is SKANKY ...
"Wanna Go for A Ride?"
"Sure Ken!"
"Well Forget It!"
I'm an ugly girl, my face makes you hurl
sad I have it, I should bag it
Acne everywhere, unwanted facial hair
I'm a relation to Frankenstein's creation
"You're so ugly you disgust me"
I'm a bland homey girl
All alone in the world
I'm as flat as a board
Thin and lanky
You're a dog and a troll
Were you hit by a train?
Don't go near you 'cause you breath is SKANKY
Don't get touched, I'm afraid
'Cause GUYS SAY, I'M AN EYE-SORE
Oooh
I'm an ugly girl, my face makes you hurl
sad I have it, I should bag it
Acne everywhere, unwanted facial hair
I'm a relation of frankenstein's creation
You're so ugly you disgust me
Boo-hoo-hoo yeah
You're so ugly you disgust me
Oooh, Oooh
"Oh let's go out and have some fun!"
" I'm sorry, But you're too damn ugly"
"Oh screw you Ken!"
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I draw my curtains and sit on my bed without turning the lights on. I bet they look at me and wonder, "What is she doing?" But I can't answer them.
I draw my curtains and sit on my bed without turning the lights on.
I bet they look at me and wonder, "What is she doing?"
But I can't answer them.
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You're a one of a kind person, one of a kind friend I just wish you were still here with me You're still a one of a kind person, but your friendship i no longer need I'm stronger without you i'm better too but you're still one of a kind to me if only i could make you see You're a one of a kind person, one of a kind friend i just wish we had never spoken i still say you're a friend, but to you... i just my journey should end you ke...
You're a one of a kind person, one of a kind friend
I just wish you were still here with me
You're still a one of a kind person,
but your friendship i no longer need
I'm stronger without you
i'm better too
but you're still one of a kind to me
if only i could make you see
You're a one of a kind person, one of a kind friend
i just wish we had never spoken
i still say you're a friend, but to you...
i just my journey should end
you kept me locked out when i needed you the most
and then that last phone call made me realize
i'm too good for you, but i still consider you a friend
that's more credit than you give to me
i've tryied and tryied to make this work
but i guess i pushed you away more than i helped
i feel sorry for you, really i do
but to me, you're still a one of a kind friend
part of another poem that i wrote:
This is what you mean to me
you're now number 1
you're still a friend to me
cause i still love you so
but what do i mean to you
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..I just found out..some one who was close to me..wants to kill them self..I've lost..a lot of people that had been close to me to suicide..and I dont think I can take it anymore..If he does so,then I doubt I can handle it..If I cant stop him..I dont even want to think about it now..Its already starting to upset me and my chests starting to hurt again..so many I should go..anyways..bye guys..
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Here is the beginning of my novel, Ready Fuels. I'm still editing it... so patience. Also, the first five chapters are depressing, but it gets more positive, so patience. Hope you enjoy. ...
Here is the beginning of my novel, Ready Fuels. I'm still editing it... so patience. Also, the first five chapters are depressing, but it gets more positive, so patience. Hope you enjoy.
Ready Fuels
Written By:
Laura Drezdzon
Chapter One
I'd listen to the words he'd say
But in his voice I heard decay
The plastic face forced to portray
All the insides left cold and gray
There is a place that still remains
It eats the fear it eats the pain
The sweetest price he'll have to pay
The day the whole world went away
- “The Day the Whole World Went Away” - Nine Inch Nails
There is silence. For once in her life, there is a moment of silence. Even though there are fifteen other people in the lab talking and floating around her, there is silence. Even though there are chemicals being pumped into her body...
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Hello! I've decided to pour out all the slush from my mind on what's been going on recently. Firstly, I've been very worn out from the querying process of my book. I finished a query letter that I'm proud of and sent it out to various agents. The problem is, I can't find any more agents to send it to that are interested in the genre, or accept unsolicited queries or email. I've gotten 9 rejections in the past week (and counting ) and it's really gott...
Hello! I've decided to pour out all the slush from my mind on what's been going on recently. Firstly, I've been very worn out from the querying process of my book. I finished a query letter that I'm proud of and sent it out to various agents. The problem is, I can't find any more agents to send it to that are interested in the genre, or accept unsolicited queries or email. I've gotten 9 rejections in the past week (and counting ) and it's really gotten my spirits low. I know that I will receive a lot more rejections and that my chances of acceptance are as slim as a sheet of paper, but damn, has it really gotten me down! I've been starting to question myself and my writing. "Am I really as good a writer as I make myself out to be? Do I stand a chance in the world of books?" I feel miserable, but I know that I just have to keep trying and not give up! No matter how painful this process is (I really feel like I've been stabbed in the heart a few times ) and how long.
I'm also a bit confused on the genre of my book/series "Sweet Cravings." I think that I've just missed out on the huge paranormal phase and am left to wander in the dust of it. I thought that my novel could be Young Adult, but my main character is 27. I think it's paranormal romance, but there's no sex in it. Could it be chick-lit? I'm scratching my head with confusion. I just keep doubting myself...
I really wanna start the second book, but I've been so down I feel as if I don't have any effort left. I also have another idea for a completely different book I think would be interesting, but I just can't seem to get myself to write.
Thanks so much for reading this! I really needed to vent, LOL! ^^
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It's only 11:33 am. But already, I know it's been another horrible day for me. I won't go into details about it , because i don't really expect anybody to read this. But if you want to know why i am feeling so awful, specifically today , you can message me/comment and ask. I would love to tell somebody, so at least somebody knows. I just dont think anybody cares enough. And now for the second part of this journal. I think, today, I am going to do it. I am going to break...
It's only 11:33 am. But already, I know it's been another horrible day for me.
I won't go into details about it , because i don't really expect anybody to read this.
But if you want to know why i am feeling so awful, specifically today , you can message me/comment and ask. I would love to tell somebody, so at least somebody knows. I just dont think anybody cares enough.
And now for the second part of this journal.
I think, today, I am going to do it. I am going to break up with my boyfriend (SAP meaning Sterling Alexander Proctor).
I'll do this, if i can actually push myself into getting out of the house.
I've never ever ever wanted to let go of Sterling!!!!!!!!! He's the only person in my life who really cares about me and he at least tries to understand.
But I think I'm holding him down. The guy's 19, he needs to get out and see the world! And how can he do that when he has a 15 year old girlfriend with manic depression? That makes me think of the movie "Benny and Joon", where even as a grown man, a brother has to take care of his adult sister who has mental issues.
I don't want to be Sterling's Joon! And so I'll let him go, seeing as I'm alone anyway. He won't mind one bit.
By the way, this is not why I feel like shit.
Have a wonderful day,
-Fivel Blake Hughes
haha. those make me smile.
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Today I am battling with my thoughts, this seems to happen to me now and then, I am normally quite strong at pushing the thoughts out my mind and carrying on like it doesnt matter. But today is different, im really battling, my friends seem to be so far away and so uncaring of late, not that they mean to be im sure, but they are right now, just when I need them most. But another day will dawn tomorrow and il still be here I hope and il carry on with a smile on my lips and a ...
Today I am battling with my thoughts, this seems to happen to me now and then, I am normally quite strong at pushing the thoughts out my mind and carrying on like it doesnt matter.
But today is different, im really battling, my friends seem to be so far away and so uncaring of late, not that they mean to be im sure, but they are right now, just when I need them most.
But another day will dawn tomorrow and il still be here I hope and il carry on with a smile on my lips and a twinkle in my eye, even if it is really just a glint of a tear.
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Rules: 1.Choose a anime/manga pairing to start out- my pick: MadaIta (Madara Itachi) 2.get Mp3,Ipod,media player and set it on shuffle 3.write drabbles for that pairing that relates to the song. As soon as the ends you stop writing and no planing or skipping songs it takes the fun away. 4. Do aproximetly 5 no less. *NOte: By the way peopel i dont know how to write drabbles so forgive me for my writign mistake and grammer mistakes* Dancing with tears in my eyes by ...
Rules:
1.Choose a anime/manga pairing to start out- my pick: MadaIta (Madara Itachi)
2.get Mp3,Ipod,media player and set it on shuffle
3.write drabbles for that pairing that relates to the song. As soon as the ends you stop writing and no planing or skipping songs it takes the fun away.
4. Do aproximetly 5 no less.
*NOte: By the way peopel i dont know how to write drabbles so forgive me for my writign mistake and grammer mistakes*
Dancing with tears in my eyes by Ke$ha:
Madara wakes up laying on the couch with akillee hangover not rembering what happend last night, He goes to his room stumbling slightly to his room openign the door and sees a lump i his bed seeing 'him' laying there. little naked 10 year old itachi 'fuck...'
Speechless By Lady Gaga:
"Itachi the truth is i..love you' He saud staring at the 6 year old blushing light pink " I know you do mom and dad love me too" Madara automaticly hung his hed sweat droping but got over it and pulled the little 6 year old uchiha in his lap "not that kind of love tachi" itachi looked up at his sensei "What kind of love do you mean sensei?" Madara shook his head "Never mind itachi ill tell you later". Unfortuntely Later came sooner then expected having to show how that 'candy' itachi found worked whcih clearly the candy was a box of condoms Itachi found under Madaras bed.
Bad Romance By Lady Gaga:
"Why did you rape me ..?" 10 year old itachi asked facign the front door "Itachi i told you i was drunk and i didnt know what i was doing..I didnt mena for it to be like this i wanted to show you that i loved you but not like this..im so sorry.." said a still hungover Madara staring at his students back. Itachi walked out the door closing it behind him walking back to his house uncofotably. By the time itachi got to his room Madara was there waiting for him, But Itachi ignored him and went to take a shower coming back otu few minutes later finding madara in his room still, Madara looded at Itachi and hugged him "I'm sorry."
Big Weenie By Eminem:
"Mean Sensei" little 10 year old Itachi pouted at his sensei after having him flick him in the forehead "It's not my fault your not being respectful" Itachi jsut stuck his tounge out at his sensei which only caused Madara to flick Itachi in the nose "ow! sensei is a big meanie" whcih only caused Itachi to pout more , MAdara only tunred away from the pouting weasel causing ITachi to whine on t...
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Some know i dated a girl named Emily right? Well i broke up with her yesterday because i didnt love her as much as i thought. I think she mightve commited suicide ! I feel terrible right now i cant breathe im crying , ive left her 5 messages and she hasnt replied and when we were talking she was cutting herself. I think she might be dead , im rlly scared someone plz help me!
Some know i dated a girl named Emily right? Well i broke up with her yesterday because i didnt love her as much as i thought. I think she mightve commited suicide ! I feel terrible right now i cant breathe im crying , ive left her 5 messages and she hasnt replied and when we were talking she was cutting herself. I think she might be dead , im rlly scared someone plz help me!
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Im tired of back stabing friends Im tired of always haing the bad ends People that say that they are ther then turn and run when things get tough im tired, of people hating me when they dont know me and randomly taking shots at me for no reason, when they dont know me acting like they dont Im not ok, i never have been i probably wont be but no one see's no one no one cares rite now im tired of everything tired of people hating each other
Im tired of back stabing friends
Im tired of always haing the bad ends
People that say that they are ther then turn and run
when things get tough
im tired, of people hating me when they dont know me
and randomly taking shots at me
for no reason, when they dont know me
acting like they dont
Im not ok, i never have been
i probably wont be
but no one see's no one no one cares
rite now im tired of everything
tired of people hating each other
im tired of sheading all of these tears
im tired of having all of these fears
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I don't feel like writing.... at all... even ever again. Nothing seems to stay, my mind changes every second like the world around me. My family seems to be forgetting... everything! They went out and bought a motorcycle, RV, and traded in the truck for a jeep! This stuff is so useless!!! they aren't going through a midlife crisis. they're too old for that. What happened to keeping what we only need! As you can see by only this much my thoughts are scattered and can not be ...
I don't feel like writing.... at all... even ever again.
Nothing seems to stay, my mind changes every second like the world around me.
My family seems to be forgetting... everything!
They went out and bought a motorcycle, RV, and traded in the truck for a jeep! This stuff is so useless!!! they aren't going through a midlife crisis. they're too old for that. What happened to keeping what we only need!
As you can see by only this much my thoughts are scattered and can not be kept in order.
Everything is out of order...
My love is torn.. idk what to do anymore! My father is going out and buying everything with my mother. My boyfriend I rarely see, I hate the feeling of waiting for him. My friends... I don't know how to act, I've never had actual friends before! My nana... she-she's just gone, my love for her is still there... and it's tearing me apart the most.
I hate being so weak! Crying so much everyday over all this! My dad seems to have forgotten his own mother! My boyfriend has forgotten our relationship. My nana... she never forgot me, not even at her funeral. Now my new friends remeber me... and idk what to do... i've never had friends that have remebered me...
All this new... it's replacing the old... some good some bad... but what am I to do?
Now a another problem come to mind... I have a new me... where's the old? where'd she go? Was she better than who i am now? have I gotten worse?
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Basically i got the at&t phone bill n there charging us 171 dollars ( i dont hav my phone anymore ) but there mostly charging my moms phone . I think i might get grounded for texting or whatever , so dad might not let me in here for a long time . Idk if im gonna get grounded , but just in case i do i wanna tell Andre, Chrysyde , Snickies, Star, Emily , Bri/Ryan , and everyone else i love u guys alot ur like a family on here and i appreciate it. Maybe i deserve getting grounded i mess up on ev...
Basically i got the at&t phone bill n there charging us 171 dollars ( i dont hav my phone anymore ) but there mostly charging my moms phone . I think i might get grounded for texting or whatever , so dad might not let me in here for a long time . Idk if im gonna get grounded , but just in case i do i wanna tell Andre, Chrysyde , Snickies, Star, Emily , Bri/Ryan , and everyone else i love u guys alot ur like a family on here and i appreciate it. Maybe i deserve getting grounded i mess up on everything i do , cant help but be a lazy dumbass. To Emily , Im sorry for everything and if i get grounded i want u to know dat ur an awesome girl hun n im sorry for not being able to love u completely . Bri/ Ryan i wish we couldve been friends in rl cz i hav alot of fun talking to u. Andre ur a great bro n i hope ull be happy someday n thxs for ur support. Well lets just see what happens when dad gets home.
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I wil be moving across the town to another house, and I don't know when I will have Internet, so if I don't update, that means I'm busy and I don't have Internet.
I wil be moving across the town to another house, and I don't know when I will have Internet, so if I don't update, that means I'm busy and I don't have Internet.
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I tried so hard not to take it. I really did, honest. Lauren had already destroyed our piece of celery and was busy examining a piece under the microscope. I looked at it. Small. Shiny. Perfect. I wanted it. I didn't care what it had already come into contact with. All I knew was that I couldn't take my eyes off it. I needed it.
I tried so hard not to take it. I really did, honest.
Lauren had already destroyed our piece of celery and was busy examining a piece under the microscope. I looked at it. Small. Shiny. Perfect.
I wanted it.
I didn't care what it had already come into contact with. All I knew was that I couldn't take my eyes off it.
I needed it.
Search synonyms for Depression: cut cup low growth pain decrease pocket anxiety score reduction
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